Exercitus Alter Albus

 Ο Σταύρος του Νότου 

Νίκος Καββαδίας 

Έβραζε το κύμα του γαρμπή 

Είμαστε σκυφτοί κι οι δυο στο χάρτη. 

Γύρισες και μου πες πως το Μάρτη,

 σ'αλλους παραλλήλους θα χεις μπει. 

The stronger the faith, the better the shields. Is getting extremely complicated the fact that I was there, surrounded by a team of failed look-alikes. 

Women (see lips) over-inflated lips, but not red.

And I feel like throwing up. 

Κούλικο στο στήθος σου ταττού. 

Που όσο και αν το καις δεν λέει να σβήσει. 

Είπαν πως την είχες αγαπήσει, 

σε μια κρίση μαύρου πυρετού. 

I feel sick, in unethical environments. 

I can't tolerate hypocrisy. 

There are 144000 incarnated. One Tree. 

An army dressed in white, willing to fight for salvation. 

Βάρδια πλάι σε κάβο φαλακρό, 

Κι ο Σταύρος του Νότου με τα στράλια. 

Κομπολόι κρατάς από κοράλλια,

 κι άκοπο μασάς καφέ πικρό. 

But I, choose to save the best for last. The Tree of life for those who made it.

 Let's just direct children properly, let's make sure to structure a stable environment, healthy, and safe for them to thrive. 

Is not a random phrase: "mistakes occurred in the past, will be torturing the future". 

Solve the problems, fix the issues, do it for your children. 

Το Άλφα του Κενταύρου μια νυχτιά.

Με το παλλινώριο πήρα κάτου, 

Μου 'πες με φωνή ετοιμοθανάτου, 

Να φοβάσαι τ' άστρα του Νοτιά. 

I feel like a minority of a person. I will try to sell my soul to the devil, just to see how it feels like. 

The face reflects the beauty of the soul. Each body's incarnation will occur according to the individual's intentions

Άλλοτε απ τον ίδιον Ουρανό. 

Έπαιρνες τρεις μήνες στην αράδα. 

Με του καπετάνιου την μιγάδα, 

μάθημα πορείας νυχτερινό. 

I have a question for all those who intend to reap off. For all those who reaped off already.

For how much did you sell your soul to the devil?

Σ'ενα μαχαζί του Nossi Be. 

Πήρες το μαχαίρι δυο σελίνια, 

Μέρα μεσημέρι απά στην λίνια. 

Ξέστραψες σαν φάρου αναλαμπή. 

Was it worthy? 

There are " incarnations". The positions are held. The selections occurred from 1970. But they should be aware since 1940. Or from before. 

On the other hand, the more they know the present. The.. hm no, Never mind. 

How can you define it? well, I guess,  constantly learn through time. 

God first. 

We are here to improve ourselves, day by day. Make mistakes, learn from them. We came to inhabit this Earth with the same potentials. We all experienced losses. 

Our great Universe is composed of values, principles, laws. 

Each action has a reaction, even a sound, a slight movement. A small expression has consequences. 

If you just make an effort to realize the great divine manifestation of our thriving Universe. You would notice the presence of God everywhere. 

The code is simple. The discovery process of the truth, in the end, is more beneficial than the truth. 

Is it worthy? Is our generation worthy? Ar we worthy of salvation?

Monday morning, kindness should not be sacrificed.

 Noble singular though, wouldn't make a difference. 

Seven values, seven graces. 

Which is the sea we missed the most? 

The lack of patience resulted in wrath and anger. 

The absence of continence will make one greedy. 

Conquer and occupational nature will result in chaos, confusion, and destruction. 

Κάτω στις ακτές της Αφρικής, 

Πάνε χρόνια τώρα που κοιμάσαι. 

Τα φανάρια πια δεν τα θυμάσαι. 

Και το ωραίο γλυκό της Κυριακής.

Respect was always a value achieved upon somebody's actions and not obliged or forced.

From God's gifts, 

Which is the one, we need the most?

From God's graces,

Which is the one, we will be wishing for, the most?

And from the virtues. 

Which is the one, we will be missing, just as much?

Somnum Exterreri

-Do you remember what occurred when you were sleeping?

*Excelsior* 

Scene one. 

She was wandering in a deserted forest. She could recall that she was searching for something.  

Her feet were damaged but weren't bleeding. She was wearing a long white dress. She remembers loss in each direction.

When she climbed the hill, she saw the back of a priest, (from the Orthodox church) standing still, staring down, he was holding something. She couldn't tell what due to distance. When she approached she saw him holding an infant. With tears in her eyes she told him :

"My baby, give me my baby, so many lives I have been searching for it"

Then he started at her with apathy and responded :

"why, so you will do it like that?"

Pointing out a hill of dismembered limbs.

At once as a cataclysm omen. Thunderstorm. 

"Wake up, you are having nightmares"

The voice of the nurse in the "psychiatric clinic" woke her up. 

Σε(μι)ναριακοί Εφιάλτες

 Σεπτέμβριος 2014

Ψυχιατρική Κλινική Αθαλάσσας

-Εσύ θυμάσαι τι συμβαίνει όταν κοιμάσαι;

Υπνωβατώντας - Σκηνή Πρώτη

 

*Περιπλανιόταν στην ερημιά, γύρω της ξέρα. Κάτι έψαχνε το θυμάται, οι πατούσες της είχαν φθαρεί αλλά δεν είχαν ματώσει. Άσπρο και μαύρο σε φόντο γκρίζο. Φορούσε ένα λευκό μακρί φόρεμα. θυμάται απώλεια σε κάθε κατεύθυνση.

Όταν ανέβηκε τον λόφο είδε την πλάτη ενός ιερέα,(φορούσε ράσα, την Ορθόδοξης εκκλησίας) στεκόταν και ατένιζε το κενό, κρατώντας στα χέρια του κάτι. Όταν τον πλησίασε είδε πως κάτω απο τη μασχάλι του κρατούσε ένα βρέφος. Τότε με δάκρια στα μάτια του είπε

''Το μωρό μου, δώσε μου το μωρό μου, είναι τόσες ζωές που το ψάχνω''

Τότε ο ιερέας την κοίταξε με βλέμμα κενό και της είπε

''Γιατί, για να το κάνεις έτσι;''

Δείχνοντας με το χέρι του ένα λόφο απο διαμελισμένα άκρα.

Τότε ακούστηκε μια βροντή, κατακλυσμού προμήνυμα.

''ξύπνα! έχεις εφιάλτες''

Ακούστηκε η φωνή της νοσηλεύτριας του κέντρου ''ψυχικής υγείας''.

No One But

 Haunted by your eyes.

In the beginning, it was the circle of the forgotten poets.

 Afterward came the circle of the pilfered losing lovers.

They never had me. But hold an image as a reminder. 

And when they sleep,

 they break their silence, with whispering languages,

 unknown. 

Integrated long ago, 

into the most ancient sacred scripts.

Everafter a circle of two thousand years, 

you & I,

 we are given the chance to unite.

to conjugate.  

Unum E Pluribus

 Can't escape the way I want You

15.07.2013

Just remember, 

Roses are blooming from the graves 

A burning Bush within the flames. 

A long before we had to escape 

Abandoned Restated imperially "imperishable". 

Perpetual Fire, forced to remain unburned, belted in desire. 

Until when? 

Enlightened stars gave birth to stories. 

Holes covered by extensions leaving blank pages between. 

Deepened from lost. When a part is reaped off. 

We need a scale to weigh the case. 

Not your depth neither my total weight. 

If you have learned to swim into the tidal waves when you reincarnate you learn to fly. 

During your dreams, you are able to arrive at

 places that you can't see, with naked eyes. 

Each time I have flashes from moments that passed.

 Memories, 

Potential glances,  from future centuries.

That I had reached out once, but now I might never arrive. 

Dive into the Source but wasn't thirsty, couldn't drink from it.

 I was made of rain. 

Flesh and blood, Johan of Arc remarked path. 

Historical fact, spiritual guard, flammable mark. 

Melody played under the moonlight. 

Seashells formed and shaped by the Sea waves. 

Dust as a single substance remains forever dust. 

If you want to learn how the unchanged eternal was made,

 you need to learn how to speak the ancient language of the trees. 

Each time the wind blows they whisper the truth. 

Time can not touch me, am made of air. 

From what I have seen so far, there is no good neither from nature it is bad 

Therefore I challenge you, I dare you. 

Call me there, take me with you. 

I give into you, resurrect me. 

With your healing touch, revive me. 

The initial spark of the eternal mind deferred from love, deferred from gold, 

might sound like Torah and look like Zeus. 

but,

Don't be scared from the depth of the Abbys. 

Meet me there.

 Otherwise, 

You will never be able to fly. 

Superno Somnia

 I had a dream, with scattered ears of wheat.

 And I was saying, is not the time yet.

Now, is time to seed.

And they were screaming "they won't be beneficial''.

 And the egg gave birth to a snake instead.

''A nightmare.''

My hands were freezing cold,

throughout my entire life.

Capable only to lift weights.

Since those marks appeared on them.

In some cases, they held the fire, pointing out who I am.

in other cases, they manifested miracles, upon desire.

  Spherical mind, multifunctional tool.

And you've seen nothing yet!

If they won't turn it into a cube.

In the best possible case.

They believed in the post-scripts.

They are searching for ''devils'', ''monsters''and ''beasts''.

And they forgot the simplest of all speech.

''The ultimate sign of the times will be, 

once you quadrangle the circle.'' 

 

The Greatest Illusion

 My entire life is a deposit for "afterwards". Either "afterwards" is tomorrow, in a month, in five years or even in the next moment. 

 Ever since I remember myself my thoughts are constantly running forward towards that magical location that always arrives but is never here. Is constructed in such detail, described either dark and dead-end or happy and hopeful (based on my emotional condition) that many times I react to transform my mood as if am there already. To that arbitrary "afterwards" that arbitrarily constructed another self of mine. Whom it might be? Which manner of speech? Under which circumstances? For what?

As I look around, I realise how impermanent and vulnerable things are. Everything sings to me: "never again". Never will I ever breathe again as this exact moment. Never will my heartbeat again, in the same way, is beating now. The next will be a totally different heartbeat, that as much as I try to visualise (as much as I try to imagine what is the meaning of life) it will be nothing at all like my pre- visualised illustrations. And that exact moment "now" becomes the upcoming "now". Perpetually.

We have abandoned our bodies here, and with the rest of us, we are wandering around in a world that doesn't exist. The most enormous prison and the greatest illusion. Until our bodies turn to dust. And let time to just pass on its own. With no additional illusions. 

Sword

 chalice but

    incomplete

Thursday, November 5th, 2020

To R.

What is the point of a battle, when the sea has already swallowed and crushed poems that were written from the wrong side of the war? 

Don't you dare to fit all that seemed to be a delicate love in a letter and leave it on my shore, because, was it ever a real love or a selfish illusion made of lies? would you like being lied to? how would you feel if your mind, intelligence, your entire being was underestimated? Is disrespectful.    

And for that reason, I will try not to be rude, even if I was, due to angriness, because not being kind is also disrespectful. With no intention to harm or hurt, the truth is better than being lied to. Therefore, I apologize.  

   But I am not sorry for being honest, not sorry for being human. I refuse to allow what I feel inside for him to become an ''aeipathy''. I am not sorry for desiring him. 

 

Because the right man for me will move mountains to be with me, he won't hide behind them. Is about respect, self-respect. 

No more tolerance for lies, especially when you know the truth. 

explanation finished. 

To P.

Last night you came as I was sleeping, you found me bent on my knees (shades of gray) watching over the world through the magical reverser slide that transforms big objects and makes them look small, significant matters into insignificant, the invisible to visible, etc.

-'' What's holding you back?''. You asked.

I could not directly respond, but when I woke up, the answer was already in my head.  

I have ''Jonathan Livingston Seagull,'' by Richard Bach, in my library, that boy who had ''bipolar disorder'' gave it to me, when I was missing, we met in the psychiatric clinic, I still remember him, not his face. When I was wearing a pink top, I remember him touching the top and pointing out my head while singing,

 ''the Pinky and the Brain'' and that was funny.

I have an entire movie complete in my head, where the focal point has to do with a black cat that passes twice unnoticed, outside the window, of a house that belongs to us, the exact moment that you grab my hand and you dance me, to the end of light.

I have a secret river, perched in the mountains of Tilliria, that I stopped to drink water once, and the day wouldn't wait for me, and the night arrived and everything got so dark.

I have a key, that opens the gate of an abandoned village, that no longer exists. It was inhabited by strange talking animals and aristocratic couples, my ancestors. Brought from times that passed irrevocably. A November's dawn, with heavy rain, the village was over floated from the waters of the river. 

I have a raw of Tibetan skulls, hidden in a bath with cherries, surrounded by veneered floors, and greek columns- thousands of years too late in Ogygia, a lost isle in the South. They are asleep and dreaming of their mortality.

I have an Angel guardian of the Sun, and one of the Moon, and every now and then they claim me for their own, the first one burns me up with is fiery edges, and the second one drowns me down with each night's tide.

 I have a rug decorated with intricate patterns, which whenever I sit on it, does not fly.

It doesn't fly!

It is packed in a warehouse in the center of a field with lemon trees.  In a mountain gap next to the Middle Earth. The caretaker once gave me a chalice, painted over, decorated with flowers during the renaissance, after was taken from the UK, where it was given as a trophy, he said he stumbled upon it when he lost his wife, and ever since he lost his memory. Every winter he picks the lemons from the lemon trees to save them from the freezing cold, and he has nowhere to give them.

I have a lighthouse in the middle of nowhere, waiting for its sea to conjugate. I have a mirror on a wall that broadcasts the things as they could be, and not as they really are. built-in to potentiality. For that reason, I was trapped in another reality that wouldn't let me see you.  

I have a story just like this, that hides another story in the lines and waits to be told by readers yet to born.

I have two stars that I enclosed in a container made of glass, and ever since, the one is crashing into the other eternally.

 Well, I have all this to hold me back, and a bunch of other things. But all I really ever wanted was you. And when I will eventually get you (in the reception between my legs) I will be pleased to be possessed by you as my master.

 Before the definition steals us and transforms us into gem-stones.

The 3rd Hallelujah 2020-11-02

 

Restated thesis 

-Walk upon the waters, not because you hold the key, but because you unveiled a brand new territory of the Sea. 

-Make all moves undercover, what's beneficial due to candid intentions is destructive in the wrong hands - On the wrong side of the warfare. 

-Into the temples that were built for the memorial psalms, others commune in-depth with the "Hallelujah". Nazi partners, they committed crimes against humanity. Still unchanged. In position authorized by you. I feel like throwing out the un-holy ''prophet - ologist'' priest, Their efforts to sell ''prophecies'' over people's sorrow and loss are making me furious. You are worst than the politician crows. Is explained in the predict Vs know. Is clear how the platform works. Stop using it for the wrong reasons. 

-if you haven't been released from chains, cage, grave, how will you comprehend your inheritance?

-One million secret names devoted to the Sky, and we name Him Ground.? 

-A couple of inches may I levitate above terrain because You Held me. Nature's rare species, a miracle in danger of extinction. 

Even though I sleep in a single bed, I desire to be kissed by You. Ever since I dreamed of you coming in, healing my trauma. Remember? 

No more snakes with lust, no more fake grooms, no more lies. 

-Who is the digger of the pit?

Actually, two different shaped ditches. For what? 

The pit is neither for the Earth nor for the one who holds the shovel. 

Is it for me and what might return from the Well of the Abyss? Is it from God's sake for the chariot of the Grail? 

Look within - Human-Eyes

-Is a shame to be wasted in vain. A disgrace to call it "Offer".

Over and over again.

- please Father, demolish the barriers, break the chains. Let them see Your Face.

I feel like spilling my guts out. 

The load of the Fire is heavy-duty to be carried out by a single person. I can't bear it alone anymore.

I need my partner immortalized. My polar opposite, the dark one, my immortal, from the other side. There is no space for games, lame performances, and pointless efforts. 

I am not available. 

all I need is Him                         

 I Am exhausted. 

Υπόμνημα

 Σάββατο. 24 Μαρτίου 2012

ποιός ήρθε; κανείς

        όλος αυτός ο συρφετός*

               κρύβει καλά εντός του

                       όσα μιά στατιστική 

                                ανωμαλία

εντέλει

συμπεριέλαβε.

σαφές; νομίζω.-

*[γελωτοποιοί - με μάσκες τράγων

ερπετά - ανίκανα να δαγκώσουν τη

γλώσσα τους

& έντομα - μονόπτερα

λασπωτήρες - λάσπης που δεν της

εμέλλετο πηλός

πόρνες - αρσενικές και θηλυκές,

χωρίς τη λεβεντιά της πουτάνας

γραφιάδες made in Korea - με 

παπαγαλί φορέματα

Τσαγκάρηδες - με μπαλωμένες

βάρκες σε υφάλμυρα νερά

ζητιάνοι - που θα 'διναν το ένα τους 

χέρι για μια σπίθα ελεΝΟημοσύνης

κτλ.κτλ.κτλ]

Κ. Κουκουζέλης

Memoran - Tomp

 K. Koukouzelis

Saturday, 24 March 2012 

       Who came? Nobody

            This entire mob*

               Is the indoor hideout

                  Of a statistical 

                       anomaly 

To conclude 

Include. 

Clear? I Opine.-

* [jesters - wearing goat masks

Reptiles - incapable to bite                  (Serpent tempted)

 their tongue 

& insects - single winged bugs 

Mudguards - of non-existent 

clay-mud 

Hores - male and female, 

in lack of the smartness of a whore. 

de - scripters made in Korea - 

wearing parrots dresses

Shoemakers - floating with 

patched vessels in brine waters 

beggars - willing to exchange

 their own hand 

for a single glance of 

*ELE - mentality 

etc, etc, etc]

[ 2020-11-01 original translation C. Eleni]